THE DREAM IS REAL
Currently adorned by a giant pin map of Europe boasting photos of pensive middle-aged men in gilets, a dizzying array of multi-coloured Post-it notes and thumb tacks connected by what looks like a drunken spider’s web of criss-crossed red string, the wall of Football Daily’s office currently resembles an incident-room crime board from an episode of Vera. With 18 different Bigger Cup matches due to kick off in different locations around the continent at the same time on Wednesday, we’re not about to go into the evening half-c0cked as the new all-singing, all-dancing 36-team group format reaches what promises to be a denouement so dramatic you could cover it in theatrical greasepaint and stage it on Broadway.
Twenty-five of Bigger Cup’s 36 teams are still waiting to learn their fate and assorted As It Stands tables promise to be humming with activity in TV studios across the continent. In the UK, former Scotland striker, TNT Sports pundit and hitherto unheralded human super-computer Ally McCoist has courageously put his hand up to take on the unenviable role of deciphering which goal means what under the pressure of live TV, a gig so stressful that it’s likely to make the final judging section of the Eurovision Song Contest look completely straightforward. With just eight teams out, only two guaranteed their spots in the last 16 and everything else up for grabs, viewers won’t know which game to watch, although Football Daily suspects much of the collective continental public interest will be on Manchester City.
While Liverpool are guaranteed a top-eight spot and Arsenal will have to go some not to join them, Pep Guardiola’s side currently find themselves standing on the precipice of pain, staring into an abyss of ignominy knowing that anything other than victory over Club Brugge will see them eliminated from Bigger Cup at the earliest time of asking. Unbeaten in 20 games, the Belgian champions are not the pushovers many City fans might hope for and need a point to guarantee progress. “I saw some of the games, when they played Aston Villa and Juventus and against Milan they played good,” sighed Guardiola. “They have done really well. Different variations in buildup and man marking – they make it uncomfortable. We would like to score lots of goals in the first 20 minutes but I don’t think that will happen.”
Already guaranteed their spots in the final 24 of Bigger Cup, Aston Villa and Celtic will meet in Birmingham with each side still hopeful of booking serene passage through to the last 16, subject to victory and a series of permutations more convoluted than the plot of Inception. “I am analysing everything, if Tyrone Mings is available he will play,” parped Unai Emery, having just returned from incepting the self-generated idea of an unknacked knee across three layers of his central defender’s dreamscape. “We have enough players to compete and feel confident. With Lucas Digne, he is an experienced player and he can feel confident playing as a centre-back in case we need [to] like Sunday.” With four of the UK’s five teams guaranteed their spots in the early or later knockout stages, only City can crash out but at least their win-or-bust permutation will make Algorithm McCoist’s job a little more simple.
QUOTE OF THE DAY
I’m not telling an authentic story if I don’t say that I’m gay, and that I’ve had real struggles dealing with hiding that. I hid my emotions as a young ref and I hid my sexuality as well – a good quality as a referee but a terrible quality as a human being. And that’s led me to a whole course of behaviours” – former Premier League referee David Coote on how his struggles with his sexuality contributed to the “really poor choices” that cost him his job last year. Meanwhile, Paul Field, chair of the Referees’ Association, believes Coote deserves to still have a continued role in the game.
RECOMMENDED LOOKING
It’s our man David Squires on … a potential next step under Donald Trump for Lazio’s fired falconer.
RECOMMENDED LISTENING
Join Faye Carruthers, Suzy Wrack and the Women’s Football Weekly pod squad as they break down Chelsea’s win over Arsenal, Manchester City’s six-goal thriller, and the WSL title race. And here’s the latest Football Weekly on the latest action in the Championship and elsewhere in the EFL.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
As there was no Premier League football on last night I decided to spend my evening looking at photographs on the British Cultural Archive and I happened to chance upon some photos of 90s football culture. I’m well aware nostalgia is a liar that insists things were better than they actually were but it’s still a fascinating look at a simpler, less corporate time” – Noble Francis.
While watching highlights of Brighton v Everton, an advertisement hoarding and shirt sleeve message exhorting viewers to visit a town in Florida caught my attention. At first it seemed like a strange choice, but when I realised how dreary and cold it is along the south coast of England now, it made total sense to encourage people to Kissimmee from where the sun don’t shine” – Peter Oh.
With reference to Stephen Rankin’s comments about Iliman Ndiaye’s Seagull impersonation brightening a dull game (yesterday’s Football Daily letters), I might add that although this is an entertainment business, the referee was not entertained, but rather booked Ndiaye for excessive celebration. Not dissimilar to Richarlison (when at Everton) and his pigeon celebration. Perhaps The Knowledge can weigh in on a player being booked before for impersonating a bird (flightless or otherwise) during a game?” – Mr Hawtree.
How did the referee manage to discern what particular breed of bird Ndiaye was impersonating? Unless I missed him leaping into the stands and nicking someone’s chips” – Kevin Goddard.
Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winners of our letter o’ the day are … Peter Oh, who wins a copy of Football And How To Survive It, by Pat Nevin. You can buy a copy from Big Website’s bookshop. Terms and conditions for our competitions can be viewed here.
SEVEN AND OUT
When Neymar signed for Al-Hilal in 2023, he had a substantial list of demands on top of his £138m salary. These were said to include but were not limited to: three dedicated supercars (Bentley, Aston Martin, Lamborghini) plus four Mercedes G-Wagons and a luxury chauffeured van to be kept “available at all times”. Other non-negotiables included a house with three saunas, a pool “at least 40 metres long”, seven full-time workers, including a sous chef to work with Neymar’s own head chef, a guaranteed supply of açaí juice and Guaraná drinks in his fridge, a private plane and expenses for his 30-strong entourage to be covered by Al-Hilal. After 17 knack-ridden months and only seven appearances, Neymar has now left, the Saudi club “terminating their contractual relationship by mutual consent”.
One of the last of a dying breed of footballers who managed to combine outrageous street skill and senseless fun with a genuine end-product on the highest stage, Neymar is still beloved the world over, not least at Santos – his boyhood club – where the 32-year-old is now being linked with a return. “I always said I want to play for Flamengo because of everything that involves Flamengo,” Neymar said earlier this month, perhaps a little unwisely. “But Santos is my boyhood love, my home.” Better. The question now is whether Neymar can actually run, because his knees have resembled little more than crisp packets for the last year or so. Here’s hoping he gets a storybook ending at Santos before diving – Scrooge McDuck-style – into a swimming pool of açaí juice upon his retirement.
NEWS, BITS AND BOBS
Tottenham chief suit Daniel Levy wants Ange Postecoglou to stay on as his lightning rod and hopes the return of knacked players will help save a sorry season in N17.
Michael Oliver will not referee the match between Arsenal and Manchester City on Sunday after the controversial red card he gave to Myles Lewis-Skelly at Wolves.
Motherwell have “very reluctantly” accepted the resignation of manager Stuart Kettlewell after “personal abuse” from a section of fans forced his family away from matches. Sigh.
Lyon have thrown Pierre Saget through the door marked faites-en un after a winless run of five matches.
Daniel Farke has done a good job of summing up Burnley 0-0 Leeds at the top of the Championship. “It was not the $exiest piece of football,” he purred.
And there were fun and games in Watford Women’s 3-2 home defeat by Lewes. A waterlogged pitch, two red cards, a sin-binning a controversial non-sending off and much, much more. This red for Dre Georgiou, who was seemingly sent off for arguing her case that she couldn’t take a corner without removing the flag because of a massive puddle, is well worth a watch.
STILL WANT MORE?
Rage against the refs has become the norm but Jonathan Liew asks: surely we can do better?
In 2022, Nicky Hayen successfully saved part-timers Haverfordwest County from relegation from the the Cymru Premier League. Now, Hayen is in charge of Club Brugge and faces a daunting Bigger Cup trip to Manchester City on Wednesday. Will Unwin sits down for a chat with the Belgian.
Brendan Rodgers has already secured a Bigger Cup playoff spot for Celtic, no small feat. But this success means the manager might already be planning for life after Glasgow, argues Ewan Murray.
All 18 Bigger Cup games, the final round of the new league phase format, take place all at once. It promises to be absolute chaos. And with some giants in danger of missing out on automatic qualification to the round of 16, Nick Ames asks if the potential for drama has made the new format a success.
Minnesota United coach Eric Ramsey gets his chat on with Jacob Steinberg about his journey from Shrewsbury to MLS, via Manchester United.
Here’s Suzanne Wrack on the departing FA women’s technical director, Kay Cossington, who reflects on her 20 years in the job as she prepares to head Stateside to the multi-club Bay Collective project.
Jorge Sampaoli’s negative tactics are not working at Rennes, reckons Ligue 1 aficionado Eric Devin.
And Nico Williams, Arsenal, Tottenham and a €58m release clause. It’s Tuesday’s Rumours.
MEMORY LANE
England’s Steve Hodge, Terry Butcher, Chris Waddle, John Barnes, Paul Gascoigne, Steve Bull, Chris Woods, Dave Beasant, Stuart Pearce and Neil Webb take part in a Mexican Wave from the substitutes bench during the 1990 World Cup third/fourth-place playoff match against Italy.
