A daycare teacher says her nap time rule doesn’t please all parents.
“Sometimes a parent will say, ‘I don’t want you to put my kid down for a nap’ but we can’t not because of state regulations,” Kimmy Middleton, a daycare provider in Georgia, tells TODAY.com.
Middleton, who goes by “Kimmy The Daycare Diva” on social media, filmed a TikTok skit reproducing a conversation between herself and a parent, while playing both roles.
“Ms. Kimmy, I’m going to ask that you not put Crystal down for a nap anymore,” Middleton said in the video. “I see that in her nighttime routine, she doesn’t really go down when I try to put her to sleep around 8 o’clock at night. So, I would just ask that you not put her down for a nap, so that she’s actually tired when she gets home with me.”
Middleton responded, “Unfortunately, the state requires that I have a rest time for all children. And I’m not going to force a toddler to stay awake when they’re actually tired from all the activities during the day.”
Playing the parent, Middleton said, “So you’re refusing to do what I ask in the care of my child? OK, but you can’t tell me how to parent.”
Middleton, as the teacher, made a suggestion.
“Maybe we should think about changing the nighttime routine a little bit?” she said in the video. “If daycare closes at 5:30 and that’s when you pick up your child, by the time you go and grab dinner or get home and then make dinner, its about 6:30 — maybe 7 o’clock? The child eats dinner, you’re giving the child a bath, maybe read a book and you’re putting them to bed. You’re not spending essentially any time with your child.”
She continued, “I get that you’re tired too — you spent time at work all day long — but spending absolutely no time, no activity with your child and then putting them down for bed at 8 o’clock, doesn’t really give your child any quality time with you.”
Middleton says daycare is usually more stimulating and structured than a home routine.
“Think about your little one: she’s exhausted during the day,” Middleton said in the video. “When she gets here at 8 a.m., she does breakfast, we get cleaned up, we do circle time, we do yoga, we do crafts, we go outside ... She’s ready for a nap. She is not going to be able to stay up at the time you come and get her. And then if you did want to spend some quality time with her in the evening, you wouldn’t be able to.”
TikTok comments include:
- “I agree. Some parents don’t want to parent.”
- “As someone who has worked at daycares, those babies need the daytime nap.”
- “Explaining the law is fine. The judgment isn’t.”
- “Pre-K teacher: 24 kids. Two kids who refuse to nap. And now three parents who want their kids to stay awake or only sleep 30 minutes. It is too much.”
- “I would switch providers so quickly for trying to tell me how I should spend quality time with MY child after I worked all day. Dinner, bath and bedtime routine IS quality time, especially during the week.”
- “It’s time spent but it’s definitely not quality time.”
- “So eating dinner together, playing in the bathtub with your kid, reading a bedtime story ... isn't quality time?? I’m confused.”
- “No, doing activities that you basically HAVE to do, is not enough quality time.”
- “My son’s daycare did this ... and he wouldn’t go to bed until 12 at night ... it wasn’t until he was in school that he went to bed at a good time.”
- “I drop off my daughter and as long as she’s safe and happy, I don’t care what she does there. Sleep or not, you do you.”
Middleton runs A Giving Tree Daycare from home, currently serving six children between the ages of 6 weeks and 4 years old.
“A lot of parents will ask to drop naps when their children are 2 or 3 years old,” Middleton, a mother of two, tells TODAY.com. “They’ll say, ‘My little one doesn’t nap at home so I don’t want him napping at daycare’ or that naps mess up their nighttime routine. But I have to lay the kids down for naps because it’s regulated.”
According to Georgia law, “Supervised nap or rest periods during the day shall be provided for children under five (5) years of age. Children who do not sleep during nap or rest periods shall not be required to remain lying down for more than one (1) hour. Quiet activities for School-age Children and other children who are not asleep shall be provided.”
Middleton says infants in her care take two naps daily (in the morning and afternoon) while toddlers nap once after lunch. Naps last approximately two hours. If a child doesn’t want to sleep or wakes up early, usually after an hour of sleep, says Middleton, they can relax on their mats until other children arise.
Kids need rest, says Middleton.
“Naps help to develop children’s brains ... and restore energy so when kids wake up, they can participate in activities,” she adds. “Playing is how they learn.”
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children between the ages of 4 months and 5 years old need anywhere from 11 to 13 hours of sleep per day, which includes naps.
For parents who doubt the need to nap, Middleton uses a parent-shared app to post photos or videos of slumbering children.
“Parents are amazed and say, ‘My kid doesn’t do that at home!’” says Middleton. “We forget that children spend a lot of time at school — in my daycare, it’s almost 10 hours a day — and not as many waking hours with their parents.”
Middleton says some parents don’t like when she points this out, along with the fact that children may have different needs at daycare than they do at home.
“I’m not necessarily telling parents how to raise their children, but in my daycare, this is what we do,” says Middleton, adding that she always strives to accommodate families when possible and welcomes the dialogue.
“Nine times out of 10, we’ll come to a compromise,” she says.
Teachers often can’t win at nap time — Middleton says some parents don’t like it when their child sleeps for too long, and therefore misses an activity or might not sleep at night.
“I wish parents understood that teachers are doing their best,” says Middleton. “A child’s nap time is also our time for a break — not that I’m sitting. Most of the time, I’m cleaning or disinfecting, eating, using the bathroom or answering parent emails.”
Middleton adds, “I need a minute, too.”
This story first appeared on TODAY.com. More from TODAY:
